Retrospective on Respect

Respect can be defined as due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights or traditions of others.

I have been thinking about respect lately.
What is it?
Is it something you deserve or is it something you earn?
Why does it matter?

The National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) mentions respect several times in their core values:
Respect the dignity, worth, and uniqueness each individual (child, family member, and colleague).
Respect diversity in children, families and colleagues.
Recognize that children and adults achieve their full potential in the context of relationships that are based on trust and respect.
We act with integrity, respect, and trust.(www.naeyc.org)

I believe respect is taught as well as earned.

However,  I am concerned we are more focused on the respect we perceive we are owed. If we want children to grow up having respect for others and for the property of others we must model those behaviors.

If I want to be respected as a professional; I must present myself as a professional.
I must dress appropriately for moving freely with children, yet not so casual I am not viewed as not taking pride in my position, as an Early Childhood Educator. I must remember that parents are watching me. Yes they are judging me on the care I take of myself. Be honest, we have all judged someone by their appearance, yes even children and their parents.

I must speak professionally. Parents are not interested in the nitty-gritty details of my evening and weekend activities. Do you discuss such things with your doctor or newspaper carrier? Then why would you become so familiar with the families who have children in your care? Keep topics to the child, their family and if asked divulge only pertinent information about your life. Would you want your physician spending your physical discussing their up coming divorce?

I must continue to grow in my education.  How can you keep your teaching fresh, relevant and fun? Grow. Take classes, attend professional forums and conferences,  read, and share with coworkers and other professionals in the field of Early Childhood Development.
Approach each of these situations with an open mind and no preconceived ideas. What can you learn or how can you grow if you feel you know it all already; or know it better than those around you?

Besides acting in a professional manner I must treat others, (children, families and coworkers) with respect.

When children are talking to you; stop what you are doing and look at the child.  Listen to them and use reflective listening skills when answering them. What they is important and should be valued as such.

When speaking with parents; take time to actively engage and restate questions so they know you are listening.  Let them have input in decisions you are making so they feel valued as the co-educator they are.  Be willing to try out their ideas, don't just dismiss them as not going to work, or already been there done that.  Ask for more specifics on how they handle situations, you are encountering, at home and what is effective for them.

When working with coworkers; Be respectful when they are teaching.
Is it group time? Stay quietly in the background, Do Not talk over them.  Why is your question more important than what the teacher and children are doing?

Are they speaking with a child, parent or coworker? Wait your turn.  If you interrupt you are modeling it is OK to interrupt others. (I see lots of us in this profession putting our needs ahead of others. I get it we are busy, but it is not about us.)

Do you disagree with their approach? Be respectful. Set up a time to meet with them to address the issue.  Do not go to others and complain.  Model conflict resolution.  It is a hard skill and one that needs to be practiced.

I will admit I need to grow in these areas.
I am far from perfect.

I fear as we are drawn more into impersonal, technological use we are forgetting what true respect is, but demanding we get it.